2.06.2009

Thutty is not a passing phase

I turned 30 and there is nothing in my reach to turn it back. Oh God, can I please get another chance to start from my school days? I now know that I should have shown immaturity as a kid and gradually increased the maturity hormones. I can see that I was totally wrong in being an adult at school. (Slap on forehead of self)
Ego
I turned 30 recently and announced to the whole world that now I have the fundamental right to not be accountable for anything. Pushing aside the snide remark from my mother that I got this right when I turned 18, I plunged into giving details about this new found right. I dont have to call home every once in a while if I dont want to. I dont have to consider anybody's opinion for doing what I would like to do. I dont have to care what people around me would think if I went jogging in shorts. I dont have to start driving. I dont have to work on work that I dont want to work for. I dont have to care if my parents are going to read my blog and hence I need to self-censor my posts. Am sure you get the drift of where I am going with the new found liberty loaded with a lot of "idonthaveto".
Alter Ego
I turned 30 recently and realised that my responsibilities have only increased if anything. I am more accountable than I have been my entire life. My dotzy looks up to me craning her neck even. I realised its high time I got some ideals and principles incorporated into my daily life fabric which has gotten so loose woven that anything and everything will fall through it without being seived. I have to shake up and wake up before I sleep through for the next ten years which would again provocate such a sad post of pretense.
Lately my only worry has been about how to position myself. No points for getting ideas about my obligingly spread base area or any other wicked thing. I have turned 30 without having any inkling about selling my ideas or skills which is a very important catalyst to ambition. And ambition is my claim to glory in my ego-"ed" dream world. Instead I have a skill to continuosly blabber my way through any time frame without alleviating any doubt the people I am meeting might have in their minds as to the purpose of the talk. I almost have the gift of the gab. Whether it is about convincing my mother-in-law to start dotzy on a lot of solids or about convincing my boss about my career intentions I can only better myself at being haphazard. I seem to have a strong power of "No" (unlike most people who have to be taught that via motivational books) and an almost scared acknowledgement of "Yes". I should have been a movie critic with the skills I have that I just discovered with this post. I think its high time I stopped whizzing past the self help books in the book store, with a look of indignation on my face for the people actually browsing through those.
What am I talking about in this post? See, I told you so.
Turning 30 means I should opine more!
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